Champagne for True Beauty

Champagne for True Beauty
Self-Esteem & Confidence

written by Grandpa Dinosaur

“Bitch it’s called SELF-ESTEEM! How’d I fuck up your self-esteem?! it’s the ESTEEM of YOURSELF!” I think these words ring true for me. It’s very true though. But leading into self-esteem and self-confidence, I have to swing back to my old article. I’m having a good laugh at the women (probably Feminists) up in a rage over this previous article I wrote. I thought it was hilarious at first. No really, you’re all hilariously funny and naive.

But seriously now, stop bullshitting me. It’s not funny anymore.

I’m not arguing and saying that’s you should not dress up, I’m QUESTIONING why you do it for OTHERS rather than YOURSELF.

Why? Why must you empower for attention by exploiting or objectifying your body? Why can’t you use your other assets?

Because from what I understand from seeing it in action, “empowerment” is telling women that it is their right to objectify themselves and not be accountable for their own safety; to boast and exploit a woman’s physical attributes over a man because that is what her power is and pity the men who are trapped by her spell.

I’ve had Feminists explain to me that is what empowerment is. And if that’s what it is, it’s bullshit! Is that where a woman’s self-esteem and self-confidence is supposed to come from, approval from men? It’s bullshit.

I thought women were intelligent, brave, and charming. I thought women had more to offer than their bodies before their brains. Is that really what is the most important thing, after all women have gained the number one asset is still their looks? Is that what you really want? You want someone who sees your looks first, and then you can bag them your other features after?

I don’t understand why women should dress up before understanding that even if they don’t got all their make-up and shoes and clothes together, they’re still worth something.

They still have value and they’re still beautiful regardless of what they wear. Why are we back to square one? Why? I thought we got over this!!

I got the seriously dumb comment that said “a woman can’t objectify their own body, only a man can.”

That’s seriously stupid, just because a man benefits DOESN’T MEAN a woman isn’t objectifying their body. A woman who is a lesbian can objectify parts of her body to attract women, and just because other women benefit doesn’t mean the women who’s showcasing her breasts is not objectifying her body. A guy can wear great pants to showcase his ass, it doesn’t mean he’s not objectifying himself. The soul is still there and the problem is still there, and I ain’t letting that soul escape before attaching some responsibility so they can take that shit to heaven and explain it to the judge.

We women have come so far.

NO I’m not objecting to the fact that women shouldn’t dress up. If you think I am telling women not to dress up, you’re stupid.

I’m telling women that they shouldn’t have to feel like they have no value if they’re not beautiful. Beauty is more than looks, ladies.

I’m telling women that they should protect themselves because there are men out there (but not all men are like this) who would treat you like garbage and just because it’s YOUR RIGHT and PRIVILEGE to dress up doesn’t mean that those bad men disappear.

Be aware that they are there. Be aware that they exist. Don’t be naive and think “because we progressed this far these things shouldn’t happen.”

They do, don’t deny that men don’t still hitting on women and it isn’t distressing at times. You should be aware that regardless of how you think men should act due to progression and your Feminist beliefs, they choose their own actions and they can easily choose to be like jerks because they don’t care about you.

No, it’s not your fault that men hit on you (unless you’ve actually been taunting them, and I’ve seen women do it and get a bad reaction), but it STILL HAPPENS.

I’m not objecting to women dressing up and being sexy IF they love themselves and do it for themselves and regardless if they do or don’t know they are beautiful and have value.

What I’m objecting to, and do listen and read well is the fact that some of you women, and you know who you are, are fucking up the privilege we have earned BECAUSE IT’S A PRIVILEGE AND HONOUR to dress sexy when women dress. [Edit:] These women I’m going to start complain about ACT like skanks and whores for attention and are easy and are cheap and are desperate it reflects badly on the rest of us. They try to pass it off as Feminism, it’s their right but it is not Feminism (as much as you would like it to be).

Is it Feminism for a woman to treat herself badly and flaunt herself for attention and male approval? Really? Is that Feminism? The Feminism I once respected so much? Is that what it is now? You can have that kind of Feminism and take it all for yourself, but it is ANTI-WOMAN to believe that women should be reduced to flaunting themselves in order to get approval and “respect” and to call it all “power.” Go and hand back the male his chauvinism, I will watch on in pure disgust and always think of it as a free card to act without responsibility.

I don’t hate strippers or burlesque dancers, Loopzilla put it best.

Word up, man. I’m not sure where to start, and I just woke up, so let me say this: I have no beef with ladies who do burlesque dancing or stripping, as long as they realize they aren’t changing the face of the world and the face of feminism by shaking their boobies in some dude’s face. I have no problem with with girls who act/dress skanky. They should know “I’m dressing and acting skanky to get a man’s approval.” However, if they come at it from an angle like “I’m showing my boobs to MEN so that I can EMPOWER *MYSELF* with THEIR COMPLIMENTS”, I might just wind up and smack a bitch in the face.

-Loopzilla

These women are ruining it for the rest of us by ACTING LIKE WHORES and SKANKS and setting a bad example for the rest of us in the boat and setting a bad example for other women by telling them that flaunting your body for attention is empowering—because men can’t resist and you should have power over them. <=I’ve heard this out of a woman’s mouth.

There I said it, some of you women are going too far with your rights.

You have the RIGHT to dress up, and you have the right to flash your titties and act like whores. But that’s great and fine, but now the rest of us who are dressed sexy, now people think we’re whores too. Thanks. Thanks for fucking it up for the rest of us. Thanks for being so easy and sleazy and selfish and self-serving so much so that people think we’re whores too. Thanks for “empowering” the rest of us, I hope a hand doesn’t slap your ass on the way out.

And just because I rag on Feminists a lot I’m not always talking about YOU. HAVE SOME BRAINS! Differentiate between yourself and the hoard, have self-esteem and some individuality. Just because you’re a Feminist doesn’t mean that other Feminists have the same ideas, I learned that the hard way when I learned that SOME Feminists don’t give a rats ass about coloured women’s right and told me to “wait in line” until it was my turn.

That’s what sisterhood gets you, it gets you nothing. It’s so people can use you to fight for their beliefs, while they take the money to the bank.

I’d rather be alone, fighting for my beliefs on my own than having someone undermine me and tell me that my problems can wait.

They can’t wait, women need to know that they’re beautiful. I need them to realize this, not telling them is not enough. They need to know inside their hearts that they are beautiful, can be loved and they have value.

I know what I campaign for is real, it ain’t Cinderella turn midnight beauty. It’s real beauty. It’s real self-confidence. It’s real self-esteem. It’s real self-assurance when you don’t look so good you know you’re beautiful because just because you have one bad hair day you’re not suddenly ugly. Maybe it’s windy, maybe your hair grew. But you’re not ugly and people won’t hate you so easily and if they do: are they your friends? Do they really care or know the real you?

Women stop hating yourself.

Women stop looking for outsiders to approve of how you look!

In fact, straight up! Stop asking me if you’re beautiful. You should know! You should know! You should know if you’re beautiful or not, and the answer is YES you are beautiful. And don’t be like, but the models—FUCK THE MODELS! Get REAL! Not everyone is a model, that’s why models are the way they are and they practically have to starve themselves to remain beautiful.

Wrap it up any way you want, it ain’t your self-esteem if it doesn’t come from within you first. You might feel good when someone compliments your hair and clothes, but that is not self-esteem.

Not everyone is beautiful, either. Some women are ugly but WHY, why should we all strive towards a beauty standard we didn’t even create, that doesn’t even have any regard for who we truly are? I don’t care if you’re ugly, you can work it too!

I hate it when girls see that I’m dressed down, because you know… I’m not a super-model. I don’t have a personal stylist and trainer, I’m a fucking human being. I want to wear jeans and whatever, and the lean in and whisper in my ear (as if I wasn’t in on the secret), “don’t you want to be beautiful?”

And I always look both ways as if I were surrounded by cameras, or there’s a cue I’m supposed to pick up on and reply, “What? I’m not beautiful?”

What? I’m not beautiful, because if I was undeniably gorgeous and bourgeois these women would never ask. I don’t have any value besides being beautiful?

I’m smart, and I can draw well and write well and I ace all my creative courses…

Is that it?

I think I’m beautiful the way I am. I like myself, I have a good self-esteem and I have a moderate senses of self-confidence and I can say is that there are days I look great and there are days where I’m at my worst, but I know that I’m beautiful overall and have value.

Just because I’m not a model making millions and going all over the world doesn’t mean I’m not pretty too or that I stop being pretty.

Why do we let other people’s approvals dictate our beauty?

They can very easily not approve… Does that suddenly make us ugly?

No… I think that it’s stupid to let someone tell you that you are beautiful.

If you ask yourself why you’re not pretty, and you don’t know… Ask yourself why you don’t think you’re pretty.

Are you comparing yourself to others?

Are you concerned about your fat?

Aren’t there other things about you that are good? Does not being beautiful reduce your overall human value? Why? Why do we as women do this to ourselves?

I question women’s values.

I’d rather be having fun and drinking champagne than starving, exercising and worrying over my weight. That’s my choice. I’d rather be happy than miserable and waiting on compliments, when I know I am beautiful and I don’t have to ask anyone. And if people compliment me, I just say thank you. I don’t need compliments to fuel my self-esteem. I’m good, but thank you.

For the few of us women who actually love ourselves, our bodies, our assets of having skills, talents, careers, intelligence… Us women who have REAL self-esteem and REAL confidence that come from loving ourselves without arrogance but with dedication. I think we have real beauty.

I think that beauty is really solid. It’s real. It’s never going to disappear without a fight and when we lose it we’ll lose something big.

Because there’s nothing wrong with truly loving yourself and your body for who you are. That’s real beauty and that’s real power. Knowing and being in control of your identity and not letting anyone dictate who you are.

And if you think I’m dictating who you are, why do you continue to read this? Go back and “empower” yourself like a Super-Saiyan, get harassed by men while you’re looking for male approval for all I care. If that truly empowers you, if you need the approval, go ahead and get it. But I still think it’s bullshit. And I will always think it’s bullshit and it’s debilitating to women’s actual self-confidence. But enjoy yourselves and be safe, whatever the hell you do with that empowerment. (Put it in savings and use it when you’re older.)

It’s your right and your life.

And I’m going to live my life happily too and I don’t need that crap. I don’t need the girl, I don’t need the gun.

You decided what your beauty really is.

But don’t let anyone, even me, tell you you’re not pretty. Because even when I’m bashing skankiness and whoreyiness, it’s because I want better for you. You should treat yourselves better, your bodies better, live your life without needing that approval so badly. You should know you are beautiful and worth it, without anyone telling you.

But I’m still going to tell you you don’t need anything or anyone to tell you’re beautiful. You’re beautiful and you don’t even need me telling you.

And you’re pretty too, boy/male readers. Haha.

You should know you’re worth it, even if I don’t tell you.

That’s real self confidence. That’s real self-esteem. That’s real beauty.

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~ by l on September 6, 2008.

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