The Beauty Bitch Rant

The Beauty Bitch Rant
Cut by: Davita Cuttita

“When someone looks in the mirror, you are looking at an experience—not who you are.”—David Icke

Spring is now here and before you know it, summer will be just around the corner.

Magazines will be gearing up with the latest diet fads, graphic designers will be working extra hard to Photoshop out “imperfections” on the latest celebrity du jour in a bikini and the most notorious male members of the Pussy Patrol™ who prey on women with low self-esteem will be strengthening their back-hand slaps.

While some of us will do our best to avoid falling into these death traps trying to make the most of the warm weather with a hot new wardrobe or haircut, a vacation, or just generally spending more time outside having fun; others will prefer to beauty bitch.

I will never understand the women who will look at someone “less than” them and think it’s suddenly OK to talk shit about and or ridicule that person. I’ll never understand why they think it’s OK to compare themselves as “superior” to said individual either.

Let’s be realistic here—of course everyone is a tiny bit shallow. Just a tad. That’s fine, it never hurt anyone to dislike the shoes/haircut/outfit/make-up/body type etc of another person; to each their own. However, it’s one thing to just dislike something, maybe have a tiny chuckle or roll your eyes and it’s another to be a complete asshole about it and think that it’s somehow it’s your duty to eradicate that person’s autonomy and superimpose your own ideal(s) on top.

Magazines and the fashion industry do this to women every day, everywhere and then we do it to eachother. Why?

We look at the women on the magazines and we KNOW about the expensive gym trainer, camera equipment and Photoshop software but so many of us would rather look like that than look like this; despite how unrealistic and unattainable we know it is. Why do we keep jumping on that motherfucking bandwagon off a cliff?! If that’s not bad enough, so many of us are also quick to pull others off that cliff into the oblivion of femininity.

I once had the displeasure of having a temp position that required me to work with an extremely superficial female. Another one of the temps I corresponded with was really fat but to me, someone’s weight is never efficient enough evidence for me to use to pass judgement on them. The job was rather stressful, so she would oftentimes talk to one of the other (skinner) female staff of the area that would joke with and encourage her but as soon as she was out of the room, would say the meanest and most despicable things about her—just because she was fat.

A woman’s beauty has always been a commodity but now the commodification of our looks comes with its own unique debts. Our beauty has been in a ” financial crisis” for a very, very, long time and rather than critically analyse it, so many of us just dig the hole deeper, throwing tomorrow’s daughters in.

If you’re defined as “beautiful”, suddenly you owe the world interest. You OWE it to the world to wear certain things, to flaunt, to have children, to “brighten up” someone else’s day. To digress slightly, I’ve told Grandpa that a lot of the time when men are cat-calling me or hitting on me, they always tell me to smile—they don’t ask, they command as if I’m a dog. Typically, I give them a royal “Fuck you!” followed by the finger. Why is it my responsibility to “smile on command” just because I am perceived as beautiful?

Worse still, why is it that the more beautiful a woman is perceived to be, the more complacent people want her to be?

Oh yeah—it’s because if you’re pretty, you’re perceived to be infallible and inherently good at everything and being submissive is good—especially if you’re female. Only ugly people go out of their way to fit in and/or sabotage pretty people, just ask Snow White about that evil queen bitch, she’ll tell ya.

If you’re not pretty well, you OWE it to the world to try to make yourself more attractive and to not do anything but cover up and stay indoors or at the gym until you’ve done so. It’s as if there’s a little voice screaming “Don’t bother going outside, having a hamburger, getting a boyfriend/getting married until you’re pretty, bitch!”

And we all submit, bowing to the god of vanity without a second thought.

Being a woman is not all about looks, gals n’ girls. It’s just one aspect of your experience as a human being and we should begin to treat the experience of being female with the respect it deserves.

We can push whole babies out of our vaginas! Can you imagine if men had that responsibility? We’d all be fucked.

Jokes aside, think about it. Being a woman is not all about looking like a magazine cut-out or fitting into size 2 jeans. My eldest brother once told me that “Women are the definition of beauty. Without women, men would never know what beauty is.”

You are gorgeous. I am gorgeous. We are gorgeous.

We are women! We have legs and arms, hips and thighs. Titties that jiggle, vaginas that tingle, booties that wiggle, soft mouths that mingle and brains that are just awesome for anything and everything. We laugh, we cry, we bleed, we try. We are mothers, we are daughters, we are workers, we are lovers, we are warriors. We are everything men want but can never be, we are fierce—we are the definition of beauty.

Again—we are the definition of beauty.

So, let’s stop submitting ourselves to the redefinition and mutilation of our female experience!

Fat, skinny, in-between, young, old, middle-aged, Black, White, Asian, Indian, Hispanic, Mixed, Native, gay, straight, bi, rich, poor, educated, uneducated, sweet or sour, good, evil or somewhere in between…we are woman, for better or worse.

You are woman, the definition without restriction!

It’s not feminism time, it’s hammer time–grab one and get to work making the definition of woman better…

Bitch, you prettay! Ma’am, you look great! Honey, you’re fine! Miss, you’re beautiful!

No more submission, no more repenting our bodies for how they are; how they were naturally made to be.

Let’s celebrate them and who we are as people for a change–with dignity, joy and gratitude.


~ by davitacuttita on April 22, 2009.

3 Responses to “The Beauty Bitch Rant”

  1. One of the reliefs of getting older is that the pressure to be impossibly beautiful comes off, or at least relaxes a bit. Somehow in my thirties I have developed the ability to say f**k you to the people who talk behind others’ backs, as well as the ones who care what your nails look like or if your lipstick’s up to date.

  2. Hi Carolyn J!

    I completely agree with you but in my humble opinion as a 22 year old, I’ve seen a lot of older women who still berate and flagellate themselves as though they were my age. They’re not bad or weak for doing so, but I think there is something desperately wrong with society when these hard-working, compassionate, wonderful women feel dishonoured and shit-like just because they don’t look like the “yummy mummies” on TV (then inadevertently or consciously passing this on to their kids).

  3. I really enjoyed your article and would like to know if I provide a link back to your site.

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